Another House speaker vote has come and gone, and apparently Jim Jordan and his “Mission: Impossible” team were unable to threaten a sufficient number of the holdouts’ wives, children, pets, and ficus plants overnight, because he lost by an even bigger margin this go-around. Looks like the plan was to keep banging his head against the wall until his face no longer looked like Jim Jordan. The more it started to resemble an undercooked meatloaf, the better his chances would have been.
Ah, but he’s out now—despite a fusillade of impotent threats launched by his allies, who doubled down on their full-court-press strategy even as it failed to sway anyone who really mattered.
Of course, if you thought they sounded desperate before, you’ll really love this. The Gun Owners of America, a pro-gun rights group that’s accused the NRA of being sellouts and has been described by former U.S. Rep. Ron Paul as “the only no-compromise gun lobby in Washington,” recently put the GOP’s Jordan detractors—who stand at 112 now, per the party’s secret ballot—on notice.
RELATED STORY: Live coverage: Jordan loses secret ballot in GOP conference meeting. He’s out!
In an email sent to Republicans, including vulnerable lawmakers representing swing districts, the Gun Owners of America states that they “will be scoring any vote against confirming Rep. Jim Jordan as speaker of the House as anti-gun votes,” citing Jordan’s continual “A” rating for defending gun rights.
Those who received the message say they see it as a direct threat, especially since groups like this one know that bad ratings could influence voters in upcoming primary and general elections.
But some Republicans, including those who have voted for Jordan, do not understand why a vote against Jordan should equate to opposition to gun rights, given they support the Second Amendment and have a legislative record proving that.
Wow, that’s the way to convince GOP House members who represent Biden-won districts! Jordan is far too radical for them, but maybe they’ll fold if an extremist group that thinks the NRA’s chock-full of milquetoast liberals tells them they’re gonna lap up every ounce of Jordan’s bile and like it. (To be clear, the group’s threat was made before Friday morning’s vote, which saw Jordan hemorrhage even more support. And before Jim was ultimately given the heave-ho. So the MAGA right wing’s pressure campaign has clearly worked like a charm.)
Also, how the fuck do you get more extreme than the NRA? Do Gun Owners of America members play drinking games during active shooting situations? Do they sponsor Little Free Libraries full of AR-15s? It’s unfathomable.
Of course, we don’t know this failed pressure campaign came from Jordan or his team. It could be just a coincidence that the GOP’s chief poo-flinging trebuchet, whom former Republican Speaker John Boehner once called a “legislative terrorist,” has inspired his backers to issue literal death threats to the holdouts. Don’t blame Jim! For some reason, egregious assholes are just really passionate about his career prospects.
For the nontweeters:
IN THE MEETING yesterday between JIM JORDAN and hold outs, close Jordan ally WARREN DAVIDSON said it’s not Team Jordan’s fault that holdouts are getting death threats. They are getting the death threats, he said, because they voted against Jordan.
This was relayed to me from many ppl in the room.
But threats or no threats, it looks like Jordan is done now. He’ll be forced to wrestle with the dread specter of his failures for the rest of his days.
It’s still amazing that he lost, though, considering he had master strategist Matt Gaetz in his corner the entire time:
For the nontweeters:
NEW: The Gaetz 8 have sent a letter to colleagues saying they’re willing to accept whatever punishment — censure, getting kicked out of conference/committees — if it means holdouts will back Jordan. Basically offering themselves as tribute in last-ditch attempt to help Jordan.
Okay, Matt. Sit down. You’ve already done more than enough. The adults are talking now—and there was no way in hell they were ever going to allow Jim Effing Jordan to be second in line to the presidency. Your little coup has failed. Feels kind of familiar, doesn’t it?
RELATED STORY: House minority whip gets fired up, calls out Jim Jordan
Check out Aldous J. Pennyfarthing’s four-volume Trump-trashing compendium, including the finale, Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, at this link. Or, if you prefer a test drive, you can download the epilogue to Goodbye, Asshat for the low, low price of FREE.